Iust want to be myself

when I was a little girl,I dreamed I could become an army to protect my lovers,but I was week sight,so I gave up .Then the middle school,a lesson of law became my dream,I wanted to be a lawyer to defend the rights and justice.But something slightly changed my thoughts,maybe I grew up and I was aware of the reality which made me doubt myself,and I always considered that what I could do besides to pass the colleage examination.At fact I was never worried about my future,probably I was confident in myself ,because I was really excellent in that moment,I thought.I wished I had never changed it.Sometimes life is like a joke ,maybe a person must change his dream constantly for adjusting to the life,however you couldnot avoid to choose or face,when my father who was my guide in my life was ill and never resume the ever I was very hopeless ,but suddenly I became strong and few tears ,then just only I knew I was so fragile that if someone told me to cry to release I would be very thankful ,but no one do that ,because my all friends understood that once I cried I would never stand up.I thought I should walk into my life again,no one can understand who I am,so I started to be eager to search myself.